Three things they don’t tell you about skate fever

Posted on April 13, 2011 by


You know I love skating. By now you’ve probably read each wannabe’s top five reasons for loving roller skating and roller derby. Like every relationship, though, there are some things the other party do that give you the shits.

1. The first thing any budding skater needs to know is that your feet will irrevocably altered. Whether you’re in synthetic boots or leather ones, the boots are made first and foremost to move effectively and secondly to be comfortable. In addition, derby skating involves spending 90% of the time going anticlockwise, which creates calluses on one side of your foot only.

Michelle’s too-narrow/short boots leave her with a permanent black toe

2. Your butt will grow! Skating is great cardio and if you have any weight to lose, you will become smaller overall. Your butt, however, will most likely grow. It may change shape, it may ‘lift’, but it will get bigger. This is kind of inevitable considering each step you take involves lifting a weight on the end of your foot.

3. Lastly, your non-skating family and friends (and pets!) will not understand the obsession. At first they’ll think it’s cute. That will wear off. Then they’ll start pressuring you to make time for them again. When I went to my first information session on joining roller derby, some derby chicks got up and spoke about the guilt involved in playing derby. I assumed they meant people with children or spouses. I honestly didn’t think what they were saying applied to me. About four months into my OSD, family and friends started making gentle comments and jokes about my recent radio silence. These days I have to schedule my life much more carefully to make sure I see them.

It helps if you can involve family, friends and pets with skating 🙂

Posted in: LimboLand